Metered Intellect.
July 9, 2008
However compact your own personal storage area may be, I can't stress enough how important it is to keep your tubes of toothpaste in a different area than your tubes of personal lubricant. I know this because I haven't been sleeping lately, and it's all too easy to grab the incorrect tube and go to town before you realize just what it is you've done.
Hint: it doesn't taste good. No sir.
On that same tangent, I have been brushing my teeth lately with tooth paste that includes myrrh. MYRRH. I found this stuff at the local grocery store as an alternative for people who don't want an overdose of gub'ment mind control drugs (fluoride) just so their teeth don't fall out. Curious? Sample Tom's of Maine's tooth paste today!
And no, I'm not a fruitcake health nut, just so you know. But I am a fruitcake conspiracy theorist. At least I am according to people who think my take on fluoride is off. I mean c'mon, people have gotten stupider and stupider the last fifty years, and what has the government been pumping into your water supply? Although, it could just be my other theory bearing fruit.
And that is, of course, that there is only so much intelligence alloted to the human race. A finite amount of the stuff, and you jerks have used it all up. And with people dying slower than the slothful turds are crapping out fresh babies, no wonder the country is getting dumber and dumber. I blame the Catholics myself. 'Birth Control As A Sin', My Hairy Ass.
Yes, that's it, squirt out more and more kids, you useless third-world uneducated turds, and convert them to Catholicism so the Nazi Pope can anoint them even though he hates you for not being blonde and blue-eyed. No worries that you can't afford to feed them. Or give them clothes. You can always give them to the priesthood.
Nazi Pope requires more little boys.
Which reminds me of old Skinhead O'Connor, and how everyone had a complete conniption when she tore up the Pope's picture on national television. Not the current Space Nazi Super Pope but the previous one - you know, the Pole Pope. The one who actually convinced those backwards inbreeds that yes, they were wrong for killing Galileo.
Sorry about that, etc, etc.
Far be it from an actual organization with sway over the minds of so many gullible brain-fried turds to come clean and recognize that the world is not, in fact, flat by the year 2000. But then I suppose that's why we have Scientology. Where some con man makes up a religion, and is on tape saying so, and turns it into a machine that craps out pallets of money.
If you dummies had actually listened to the esteemed O'Connor back then, perhaps a few less of your young boys would have been anally perforated by deviant old men who wander around in robes all day, telling you how bad a person you are even as your son is sucking on their dongles. But you must secretly like the idea of old men violating your babies.
Or you wouldn't keep exposing them to these horrible people. I mean c'mon, State Sanctioned Pedophile Club! They get a tax exemption to aid and abet the reprehensible child-raping filth in their ranks, and you donate money to them. You sit there and let them judge you weekly. You let them brainwash your families to become them! You sickening twits.
It's too bad the world is so heavily overpopulated, thus watering down the intelligence quotient of the human race, or maybe you could see this. Instead you let these monsters into your lives and support them. You may as well cut out the middlemen and rape your own slack-jawed children, because you're 100% complicit every time you give a church money.
Just think, every time you tithe: how much of this money is going to pay the legal fees of a pedophile in my community?
This anti-religious rant (yeah, not my first, and probably not the last) has been brought to you by the letter Epsilon and the number 6,825,356,182 (your current population as of the second this was gibbered).
So perhaps you find yourself wondering why I'm so angry about the vast numbers of people sucking up my valuable air? Well the answer is simple. How am I supposed to reproduce (theoretically, some day, mind you) if you brain hogs keep occupying all the intellect? The Pool of Brains is at a deficit and if I am to concoct new life I need to free up some.
So you know, before I can retire to my island and start producing my lovely, smart clones of myself, I need to end some of you. A whole lot of you, in fact. And you know it's hard to get rid of a few billion people in one sitting, particularly when I can't really be bothered to get out of this chair. So I am going to start investing in biochemical warfare.
At least, if China doesn't poison itself to death in the next twenty years. I suppose then, if that fails to go down, I'll get to it and start with the genocides. But what country to start with? Hmm... 'The Vatican' sounds promising. Full of old perverts and genetic freaks that have been hoarding a disproportionate share of humanity's intellect for far, far too long.
Of course, we're talking about the criminal organization that burned Galileo at the stake, for insisting the world is not flat. So perhaps I'm giving them too much credit. But you see, it's not mass murder. I'm like a modern day Robin Hood. I steal brain power from the undeserving and give it back to the wee youths yet to be born. I'm going to be a hero.