Undeath bed.
July 23, 2008
Mmm brainsss... Zombie Denny rises from the grave - beware, sucka!
Contrary to popular belief, I didn't die horribly on the operating table today, although it's hard to tell that from what I'm feeling right now. I am completely and utterly hopped up on the painkillers and yet, and yet. It's amazing how, despite being on dope, I can clearly feel every stabbing burst of pain coming from my 'core' when I move.
I swear, every single muscle in my body is tied into my abdominal wall. Abdominal. For some reason I keep wanting to say ABOMINABLE. Like unto the snowman. I'd like to say it's the drugs talking there but it might just be my own weird dyslexia coming into play. "Help, doctor, my abominable wall is killing me!" Something like that.
So you may ask yourself why the Hell I'm at the desk as opposed into the bed? Well, I have to pee like every hour it seems, so I keep waking up and going and figured this time, while I was up, I'd check my e mail and whatnot. And I find it easier to get in and out of this chair than to get in and out of my bed. Which blows, 'cause I want to sleep.
And, you know, heal.
So apparently the doctor took photos of my guts while I was out cold, with the camera he had inside me to show just what on earth was going on. It's sort of mortifying to see your innards all strung out and laying just where they're not supposed to be. But I also got to see the 'after' shot with the new deal holding them in place.
But on the plus side, the 'hard' part is over. Now I just get to lay around for the next eight days as things stitch themselves back up and I get back to 'normal'. Not sure what I'll be doing with myself just yet, as I'm not sure how I'll be healing - or how fast. So I may or may not be updating this thing in a haphazard fashion.
Which is, you know, totally different than the usual. Totally! But I'm trying to get better about talking in here daily, since it seems there's inexplicably more than three people actually reading this thing. Maybe it's random people finding me on Google somehow, I dunno. But, apparently a few people want to hear me ramble like a maniac about what I hate.
And since I hate everything, well.