All About Chris.
September Deux, 2008
So it's finally C-Day ™. What the heck is C-Day ™, you ask? Well strap in, Buck-o, 'cause I'm gonna tell you.
See for a while now, I've been plotting a drastic revision of my 'life style', a sort of overhaul of Denny in its entirety, in order to accomplish four specific goals. The first of these is of course to get my act together. A large portion of my junk is sitting in here in vast piles that need sorting out. I went to the trouble of organizing them into like piles, so it's not a big frightening 'mass' of stuff, but it'd be a lot better if it was, oh, not here. I'd like to donate some to Goodwill but the one here likes to throw our stuff away.
Even when it's brand new and in the package. Because they're snobby self-entitled 'Millard' (read: annexed douchebags in southwest Omaha that believe they're better than their neighbors) that think they're the bee's knees and that they really work at a Macy's or something. I think they get confused since the two are so similarly spelled or something. The trick is driving... way downtown to drop off some stuff to a thrift shop or actual useful Goodwill that might have a use for the stuff. Or at least appreciate people getting off their butt to make an effort.
So part one is to get, at the very least, my personal living space in order. To have everything sorted and immaculate. I am not filthy by any means, but for Marduk's sake I am horribly disorganized (as I've discussed with all two of you in the past)... and you've seen some of my efforts bear fruit in previous photographs. Well, once I'm done with that I can share imagery of all the rest of my place, and say hey, part one is now complete. Woo woo! The motivation here is to get to part two of my four plot Plot to get my life all unscrewed.
Part two, of course, is to get Money, and to get Money, I need to get my second job working properly. To this end, I will be finally getting my web site for my web marketing business going. It's not really much of a business yet, but the idea is once I get the site functional and sexy, I'll be able to grow it from a 'leisurely side line' to a 'primary source of income', and thus relieve a metric-ton of stress that I get daily from my primary job, dealing with censored censored censored that I swear pay us just so they can scream at me. ME.
Part three, which will take a whole lot more time, is getting my body back in order. The series of medical calamities that have stricken me down over the last two years have really done a number on me - which sucks hard core since about three years ago my tubes was finally working properly. And not just my dick, I mean, but my life. I was on the verge of getting my own house and having some privacy and happiness and you know, mail order sex and the works. But then my body, it betrayed me! ME! To that end, I'll be noting progress here.
Now, I'm not about to say how much I weigh, because that's a point of sensitivity on my end. However, I am going to begin with a 'control' for you, which is Zero (0). What this represents is the physical mass I am at now. Our number will (if all things go according to plan, and that plan is to make myself work out every other day to start, at least until my body is used to it after the month-ish of being all laid up doing nothing) slowly sink, over time, and I will demonstrate this in the form of negative digits. Hopefully it will sink faster'n I think. But we will see!
As for the fourth goal, that is the most important. It is to get out of debt, paying off all my medical bills that have accrued over the last few years, along with all the incidental other emergency bills I have stumbled into since all this started. I have two (2) credit cards and they are near-critical, and that's before this third wave of surgery that I have. I am going to try and 'work' something out with them to make payments, 'cause I don't think the cards can hold all those fees this time around. They're full of old dick operations, y'know.
But as preparation of sorts for this Lifestyle Change ™, I have been enjoying a few things that I am, as of today, about to cut out of my life. Again. This include all the 'expensive frippery' that I enjoy which isn't going on my cards but probably isn't helping me pay things off faster. Like 'movies' and 'Reese's Peanut Butter Cups' and 'lunches that cost more than three dollars'. My last feature film I'll be seeing for a very long time (unless someone is buying) was over this Labor Day weekend, when my friend Chris (Acers) dragged me out the house.
This film that we saw was Death Race. Now if you've played any of the 'Twisted Metal' games for the Playstation, you know what you're in for, and need to go see this now. But that's Acers there on top, in case you were wondering what the picture of this complete weirdo up there was about. Now that picture wasn't taken over the weekend, but while we enjoyed a bit of Godfather's pizza a few months back. You can see what horrors await a pizza whenever Acers gets around one by looking at that second picture. I took that, well, because.
What that man does to a pizza is simply ludicrous. He's the kind of guy that would revel in the whole Atkins 'pizza in a bucket' craze if it hadn't died off a slow death out west. Now a pizza in a bucket sounds delicious to me. It's all the stuff that they would normally top a pizza with, glopped into a bucket, and then sold like that - sans crust and the like. Of course, it puts one in a mind of those horrible KFC chicken bowls, which are ridiculous and the ultimate epitome of lazy stupidity, but... it's pizza. In a bucket!
Anyway, we went to go see Death Race over the weekend, and when we stepped out of the theater we found that someone had Dicked up his car. And by Dicking it up I mean they drew a gigantic dick on his driver side window. This is the sort of thing that would have likely set me into a rage if it were anything else but for some reason I couldn't stop laughing at it. And Acers couldn't either. The oddity was nobody else's car was Dicked up, so I used my keen Detective brain and deduced (correctly) that it was his ex-girlfriend that had done the Dicking on his car.
She was the only person besides my family that knew we were there, and you know, I can't imagine my sister hobbling up to the theater and Dicking up someone's car. Especially since you know, she'd probably get the wrong car. Or forget to stop at one and wind up just painting Dicks everywhere and eventually get arrested or something. Which would be hilarious, since lately she's a high school lunch lady. Now there's a story the kids would love to spread around the school at faster than light speeds. "HAY GUESS WHAT THE LUNCH LADY GOT ARRESTED FOR?" Ah, good times.
For the sake of completion, I have included a photograph of the Dicking girl. I assure you that today is not, in fact, a stealth exercise in cleaning out my camera, despite what you may be thinking. Oh I know you are, all two of you, but just because this one was in there since Halloween 2007 when I caught Acers and the Dicking girl all boozed up in their 'A Ghostbuster and random hooker' (?) costume team, doesn't mean anything. It's just that I didn't really have a need to feature the Dicking girl on the site until, well, the Dicking occurred.
DICKING.
But this whole Dicking episode was part of the deal leading up to C-Day ™, being, of course, Calamity Day, which is now Today. Well, it will be once i wake up in the AM, but it's the AM now so I can talk about it. The idea is (well, in the next few days at least) to sort out the sleeping issues or just drug myself so I sleep at night so I don't sleep all day. Like, for instance, today. And to totally realign everything I do in order to Un Junk My Self (which I do thanks to the blatant inspiration of my friend Siryn - the one who sent me ze books.
But sorting out the sleep at least minimally is Step Zero, really. I was talking to people late last night and I don't think half of what was actually being said was going into my brain. When somebody says something that may be hinting something but it takes me 3 hours to figure it out, it's time to start sleeping again. Because I'm tired of feeling like an idiot all the time. I may be clueless in the whole human interaction thing but damn, I like to think i'm not stupid. And lately... I feel that. As well as tired. And sick.
And you know, sick and tired of life. But blahblah. I will start posting Numbers for you as I get them. I weigh in when I wake up when I'm working on that for the 'fresh start' aspect, and I don't have one yet anyway. I am writing this at 3 AM (CST) so ... I haven't woke up for work yet. I haven't in fact gone to sleep yet, 'cause somehow the Codeine Sleep Enhancer has not yet kicked in. And I don't think it's going to at this rate. But eh. C-Day ™ is now on, and we'll see if I survive. I dunno if I can handle an hour on the treadmill tonight but we'll see.
If not, you'll hear 'lazy clown died on the treadmill at 24 Hour Fitness - Film at Eleven!' on the news.
Marduk, did I write a book this morning?
P.S.: Killed the 'numbers' idea for now. Sorry. I am a worm.