I hope someone catches Eye Herpes.
January 13th, 2010
So someone got into my car again.
Over the last few days, it'd been so cold and wet here in Dayton that my driver side car door had taken to freezing shut, if it was locked. So I had gotten in the habit, since it was so goddamn frigid out, of leaving it unlocked - so I could get in. Besides, I thought what else did I have to steal left in the vehicle? I'd stripped out everything I really wanted, particularly after the last time someone did this.
Or so I thought. I noted this morning when I got out to scrape everything off, both outside and inside the car, that the passenger side door was oddly not-quite-closed. I didn't think anything of it, but when I went to plug my Blackberry into my CD/Cassette adapter, I was missing the cable. And upon further investigation, the adapter. I thought maybe I'd just yanked it out upon crawling in the passenger side door at first.
But no. Apparently some cunt-faced weasel thought that they simply had to have the fucking adapter, and stole it. And apparently fucked up the guts of the antiquated tape deck in my car in the process. Which leaves me a question to Mister Shit Tick Thief. How hard is it to hit the motherfucking eject button? I know you're clearly retarded, due to you stealing out of your neighbor's cars, but what the fuck?
You push the button, the tape adapter comes out.
I'm no rocket surgeon, mind you, but that's what we in not-retard land call 'easy'. I mean, if you were going to fucking steal from me, that's one thing, but at least you could do it without demolishing my shit in the process. Also, if you're the same fuckwit that stole my CD player last year, I'll have you know that you still managed to not steal the motherfucking power cord, so it's still fucking useless to you.
I hate you, and I hope you die horribly. From herpes in the eyes. Which won't directly kill you but it will blind your retarded ass. Which means you'll have to live suckling on the government teat all your life. And while society will have to pay to continue your miserable existence, I guess they would have to anyway, if you finally get caught and become an anal pincushion like your pussy ass is fated to in prison anyway.
You see? Here I try and I try and I try to be more upbeat and less negative, but then people enter the equation. It's fuckers like this that make me want to sharpen up my hatchet and just engage in indiscriminate murder. In vast quantities. I figure maybe if I hatchet up enough people I'll eventually hit the one(s) who stole my shit? Probably not before the cops would take exception, but I can dream.
Oh, can I.