Awful chemical stews are hardly a tasty treat.
April 7th, 2016
I should have said 'No, thanks' when one of the old ladies at work offered me the thing. It wasn't like some homemade old lady treat that she'd slaved over a hot stove all day to make. No, this was a mass produced abomination by Hershey's that was nominally egg-shaped, as long as you didn't pay attention to the third dimension, and was filled with what they liberally called marshmallow.
I knew better. I really did.
But then I ate it anyway.
I regretted it immediately.
After a week of cleansing my body of processed junk by eating vastly superior, homemade foods, this hit me hard. Very hard. The wall of refined sugars and assorted horrible chemicals hit my stomach like an inside out punch, and I slowly sank into my break room chair. I felt awful, a situation which continued for hours, and the whole time I was (proverbially) kicking myself the whole time.
The worst part, I think, was the so-called marshmallow. Hershey's is ostensibly good at making chocolate, but I'm not sure how much chocolate was actually in that chocolate marshmallow egg. And I'm certain that there wasn't any actual marshmallow in that horrible thing, either. Whatever was posing as marshmallow in that supposed confection left an aftertaste that remained for hours and hours. And hours.
Luckily, Brenda built a really good dinner, something of a south of the border pizza made with a homemade crust, delicious cheese, and a layer of spicy, crumbled ground turkey. That seemed to mostly take care of the overt discomfort left me by that stupid Hershey's 'treat', though I had lingering issues the rest of the night. Like those burps that brought chunks and fluid up with them. Hurp.
Moral of the story: don't eat those stupid Hershey's 'marshmallow' 'eggs'. Yes, the Easter marketing season is over, but if you have any left after opening a package (quite likely), or picked up a pallet of them in a grocery store clearance the Monday after, get rid of them. Burn them in a dumpster if you have to, because you don't want the homeless or animals attempting to eat these atrocities. Trust me.
No Stars.