Welcome to the Obnoxious Jerk. This collection of ones and zeroes is a home for the writings of its author. It is different than most digital resources you might be familiar with, because I am not a fool, and have not built another forum within which everyone can add their own two cents regarding everything they read. If you want to do that, you're going to have to build your own site, for this is my space.
While a lot of what you will eventually read here will be original to the Obnoxious Jerk, the truth is that I have done this before. My previous haunts of this stripe were banality.com, which I have traded away for some arts, and thegreatsatan.net, which I never really got around to doing a whole lot with. Probably because nobody respects .net domains, so that was most likely a good call.
Either way, I am porting material from those sites to this one, because why not? No need to throw out all my previous writing when it can readily apply to what I'm doing here. Mind you, a bit of it may need a bit of polishing, not to mention the removal of references to the previous domains, so it'll all arrive eventually. Slowly, I imagine, but eventually. Stick around, and you'll see. You'll all see!
My urge to write freestyle is haphazard, but it does persist. You may see me posting every day for months at a time, or you may see me post nothing for a similar amount of time. This is because I work a lot, and when I'm not working at work I'm often working on numerous other projects of mine. You can find more about those at Technohol 13, which I hope to finally complete, to an extent, before I die of old age.
But when I'm not nerding it up there or on one of several related sites, and feel the need to translate the static bouncing around my head meat into quasi-rational text, the plan is to drop by here to get it on. Perhaps the third time will be a charm, as it were, and I'll finally get into the regular habit of sharing my thoughts, gibberings, and opinions in one place. Beats wasting time on antisocial media, right?
The primary landing point of the Obnoxious Jerk web site gives a chronological stream of everything I've written for it thus far - at least, for this site. For an index of that material, as well as what I've written for the Jerk's predecessor, Banality, and its predecessor in turn, the Great Satan, just scroll down. This way you can link to an individual gibbering, which you will surely do, because they lovely, are they not?
Well, at least you will once I rehabilitate all of these things. Need to do some reformatting and what-have-you, which I'll get to as time permits. Sorry for the hassle! Expect more to show up as stuff happens.
It's finally over - January 1, 2021.
Satisfaction - May 5, 2019.
The Most Villainous Villain That Ever Villained Am I - February 2, 2019.
I am the most professional person ever. - January 9, 2019.
Can you see the resemblance? - January 8, 2019.
Dumber Than Even I Thought Possible - January 7, 2019.
I Had A Weird Dream 5 - January 6, 2019.
Welcome to 1998! - January 5, 2019.
Robots Slumming In Disguise - January 4, 2019.
Draw Doodles - January 3, 2019.
The Greatest Satan - January 2, 2019.
Insert Pithy New Year's Day Title Here - January 1, 2019.
Get out of the pool, Croc Master. GET OUT OF THE POOL. - December 13, 2018.
Sticking it to Incels - November 19, 2018.
What Are You Tarkin About? - November 18, 2018.
Villainous Diversions - November 16, 2018.
Book Much Less - November 10, 2018.
Heroic Diversions - November 9, 2018.
The Goatpocalypse is Now! - November 3, 2018.
One Wonders How One Becomes A Cross-Time Banker - November 2, 2018.
That Didn't Last Long - October 29, 2018.
Crazy Hate! - October 26, 2018.
(pop) - October 20, 2018.
Smash-up - October 19, 2018.
BathroomGate Continues - October 15, 2018.
Hax - October 12, 2018.
(Sexually?) Harassed - October 11, 2018.
First, but not Foremost - October 5, 2018.
I'm Lovin' It ™ - October 2, 2018.
Of the Criminal Sort - September 28, 2018.
Loungin' - September 24, 2018.
Not Eraserhead - September 21, 2018.
The Black light Room - September 20, 2018.
The Battery Odyssey - September 15, 2018.
Punny - September 14, 2018.
I Should Have Been A Detective - September 10, 2018.
Twit No More - September 8, 2018.
A Bit On The Nose - September 7, 2018.
I Warned Them - September 6, 2018.
Don't Try This At Home - September 4, 2018.
The Pixels Less Traveled - August 31, 2018.
No, Seriously - August 30, 2018.
When Superheroes Let Themselves Go - August 24, 2018.
Animal Cracker Activists - August 21, 2018.
Alex Jones Lost the Info Wars - August 6, 2018.
The Great Banal Jerk - July 31, 2018.
Same thing, will rehabilitate these soon.
If only the American media had a spine. If only. - June 25, 2018.
My coworkers need a different outlet for their pent-up douchebaggery. - June 21, 2018.
Weird how that works. - June 19, 2018.
Misfire - June 8, 2018.
Mesothelioma Soup? - January 16, 2018.
But Wait, There's More - January 15, 2018.
So really. Who puts barbed wire fencing around a church? - September 10, 2008.
Lousy Razor. - September 09, 2008.
All About Chris. - September 02, 2008.
Attack of the killer FEMA. - August 22, 2008.
5. - August 01, 2008.
Give it moar drugs. - July 31, 2008.
High speed danger photography! - July 26, 2008.
Random Things 2 - July 25, 2008.
Bizarre Bondage Nurse. - July 24, 2008.
Undeath bed. - July 23, 2008.
Have I mentioned I hate the Space Nazi Super Pope? Plus: O Hai Ku. - July 21, 2008.
Ads: You're Doing Them Wrong. - July 11, 2008.
Random Things 1 - July 10, 2008.
Metered Intellect. - July 09, 2008.
Medically Malcontent. - July 07, 2008.
Sprint = Meh. - June 20, 2008.
Holy cow, I organized. - June 19, 2008.
Proofread! - June 18, 2008.
Jesus freaks at work. - June 17, 2008.
Downtown Omaha's Leahy Park. - June 02, 2008.
Trying to enjoy the awesome despite unsupervised brats. - May 27, 2008.
How banal. - May 26, 2008.
A Bungled Murder? - June 15, 2003.
Almost Killed. - June 15, 2003.
-->Rejoice, for I give you the gift of COLOR! Black, Red, Orange, Green, Cyan, Blue, or Purple! Okay, fine, the color was already there to begin with. I'm just giving you the option to pick the color you prefer, in case one of them makes your eyes wiggle. I have that with the green and the cyan, sometimes, so I know the feeling. So have at it, though I don't think it's permanent or anything.